There's this story in the Bible where one of the religious leaders of the time asks Jesus what the greatest commandment is. He was trying to trip Jesus up, but Jesus responds to him, none the less, and says, "You must love the Lord your God with all you heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. And the second is just like it. You should love your neighbor as yourself. No other commandment is greater than these". In one statement, Jesus takes all the religious rules and regulations of the time and boils them down to one word... LOVE! That's what He asks of us, that it what He requires of us, and that is what He constantly shows us! So why is it so hard to do it?!?!
When I think about my own life and the attitudes and actions I have carried out in the past week alone, I have to admit that while I want to be a loving person, while I want to love God with everything I have and love others the way I know Jesus would want me to....I'm honestly not that good at it. I try....I do. And sometimes I get it right. But more times than not, I get so wrapped up in myself that I forget that I am not the center of the universe and before I know it I am exuding selfishness and self-centeredness and everything that is the complete opposite of love.
And don't get me wrong, I know the very ability to love others come from a place of knowing you are loved, and that when we understand how truly loved by God we are...and how freely and unprovoked, He shows us His love....then the gratitude of it all gives you the ability, the inspiration, the desire even, to love others. And yet, sometimes...over and over again...I forget the magnitude of the Love of God...and everything else just goes to shambles.
Why does that happen?! How is it possible to forget the fullness of the love of the very one who gave his life for us?!?! How does the love of God become something that we know in our heads, but don't allow to really impact our hearts?!?! And I know I am probably just thinking about myself here, cause nobody else who calls themselves a Christian ever struggles to keep God on the throne and ourselves bowed before him (I'm being sarcastic). But when it happens what do we do?!
Well for me, I'm starting to relate to God in a whole new way.... a way that is completely open and transparent and says, "I know I don't have my act together, but I also know you love me"...and thus I find in those times when I've fallen again in my own pile of poop (metaphorically of course), that instead of running away, I need to run straight into the arms of my father.God who is holding out His arms to me. I need to run to Him to remind me again of His grace and His mercy and His love. I need to let myself sit there in his presence and just soak in the reality of a God who is not just some "big guy in the sky", but whose a Daddy, who loves to be with His children.
It's in the presence of God that I am reminded of who He is and who I am. It's in the presence of God that I feel loved and accepted and know my place in the world. It's in the presence of God that I understand once again His great love for me, and the weight of this love transforms my heart. I don't want to come off sounding religious and like I'm just saying the words I think you need to hear. I'm speaking the truth from my heart....from my life...this is real.
And that's the thing about God's love....it's bigger and more real than we could ever imagine. It's a river that when we get caught up in it, we lose all control and find a new way to live that's not about us, but rather the current of the water. And it's in that flow, when we stop trying to swim against the stream and we learn to just rest in the waves, that life becomes what it's suppose to be. We stop striving, we stop trying to make it on our own, and we just surrender.....and the love of God washes over us, it fills us up and it begins to pour out of us into the world.
So, I don't know what the next week holds, what the next months or even the rest of the year has in store for me....but If you need me, as Kent Henry sings, you can "Find me in the River"...I hope you'll join in to...I think that's where true life begins and real love flows. Amen.
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