Tuesday, November 4, 2014

It Starts in Us...It starts in Me...

  Today my teammates and I went prayer walking in our community.  We do this every Tuesday, although not always in our community, and for the past several weeks I've been really struggling in it.  I haven't been sure what to pray, I haven't been feeling very "productive" in my prayers, and honestly at times I have wondered if it's all just been a waste of time!
  Today however I took some time to go off on my own and pray as I walked up and down the different streets near our house.  As I was praying I was starting to get a bit annoyed with myself as it seemed like I kept coming back to the same prayer which really had more to do with my team than with our village.  I kept hearing myself pray "Lord give us your heart for this people...help us to see our neighbors how you see them....help us to love them like you do....give us a cry deep in our souls that can't be shaken, for revival and renewal to come to this place".  BUT THEN in the midst of all those prayers I felt this unexplained peace, like God was smiling and saying "Yes, this is the Spirit through which I can work.  This is where is begins".
  My initial mindset in most things is to try and figure out how to do things on my own.  It's not necessarily that I want to make a name for myself, but more so that I don't really like relying on other people...sadly, sometimes that even includes God.  Over the past month there have definitely been times where I've sat down and logically thought about how we as a team can truly reach this community with the gospel.  I can come up with 5 point plans and step by step instructions on what I think will work, but in the end I always hit a road block when it comes to one important point.  I cannot make anyone come to God; I cannot make anyone become a Christian.  It's soley the work of Christ that can move in a heart and bring them to himself!  I can lay the ground work, I can even encourage and teach a person, but it's really not what I do that matters, but rather what God does that really changes a life.
  This is not to say that we shouldn't try or that we should just sit on our butts all day and hope for God to rain down miracles.  Clearly the way God has chosen to move in this world is through us and thus I think the most important thing that we can do is just make ourselves available to Him. 
  It's like I wrote in my journal the other day...a person can't lead someone else anywhere they are not willing to go themselves.  Meaning that we can't expect the people in this community to run whole heartily after God, if I myself  am not doing so first!  Leaders lead by example!  And so, for that reason, I will pray all the more for God to come and in work in me and give me His heart and mind; that in becoming more like Him, I may be the door through which people will meet Him for themselves!

No comments:

Post a Comment